Flying sayings

Some things Pilots say.

• The three most useless thing a pilot can have.
  
• Altitude above you
• Runway behind you
• Fuel you left in the truck.
  
• When in trouble
  
• Climb - gain altitude
• Conserve - Fuel
• Confess - Get on the radio and tell everyone "I'm Lost"
  
• You can't pray on a lie. (Huck Finn)

"For a prayer to be heard, your heart must be right with God. To pray on a lie would be to pray when your heart is elsewhere, or when you pray for something that is a lie.

Actually, I suppose you could pray on a lie, but it wouldn't go any higher than the ceiling." (Plagiarized from a lady named Barbara V.)

• It is almost universal, the last words uttered from a pilot before the crash is
  
  

  OH! Sh*t

  This comes from a taught or acquired belief that, as a Pilot, you are capable of correcting any and all malfunctions of man or metal to bring the cursed craft to earth safely.

  When it is discovered that this is wrong, you are so close to eternity that you can only utter two words.

  Why these two have been chosen, is unknown.

  But we all know to do it.