Narcissistic Mothers' vanity - a classic trait

 Know anyone this fits?... I'll bet you do if you know me and read this blog.

* Dresses to the "nines"

* Has had a face lift

* Is indeed thin

* Says "I'm beautiful" to strangers

* Believes she is a "Timber Baroness"

* Believes she is suppose to park in the "reserved for clergy" spot at the hospital.

* Has/Had a gigolo 40 years younger than herself (has a Grand Daughter 50)

* Takes flower off other peoples graves and puts them on hers...saying they'll just die anyway.

Narcissistic Mothers' vanity is a classic one of their traits. Having said that, not all of them have it, so if your mother isn't vain, it doesn't mean she's not narcissistic. (Nor does a good interest in one's appearance, by itself, mean narcissism.)

Now, we all like to look well. I'm not talking about normal self-care or pride in your appearance.

I'm talking about an obsession with her looks. I'm talking about ALWAYS being perfectly dressed and made-up - perhaps even just to take out the rubbish bins! I'm talking about over-dressing, i.e. wearing too formal an outfit, and too much jewellery and make-up for an occasion. (Again, people sometimes do this because they misjudge it. And some people just like jewellery and make-up more than others. But this vanity is more than that.)

It might also involve excessive preening of herself in the mirror. Admiring herself, appreciating herself and her beauty. 

Narcissistic Mothers' vanity includes body size, you won't be surprised to read. They often hate being fat, or perhaps even normal-sized, and are very judgemental of people who are overweight. And they can thus put huge pressure onto their daughters to be equally slender, which can often lead to eating disorders.

For Narcissistic Mothers who have this extreme vanity, ageing is even more difficult than for the rest of us. The rest of us mourn whatever beauty youth gave us - but for Narcissistic Mothers aging is an absolute disaster. You may find therefore that they become addicted to cosmetic surgery, or maybe just to dressing much younger than they are. Hanging onto their youth with every fibre of their being.

Great credit given to the folks that own and care for the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers Web. Already have said what it would take me years to say. Turns out, its all so predictable.... and not even a disease.

http://daughtersofnarcissisticmothers.com/narcissistic-mothers-vanity.html